I find it pretty funny/unusual that I can only blog when I am
feeling emotionally exhausted. Lately I have been lecturing the people I love about
the importance of faking it till making it. “Push for positivity and move
forward”. At this moment I am standing in front of me yelling it out loud but
for some reason I can’t hear me. Some moments I feel like life is excessively
feeding me from the grownups plate, not allowing me to enjoy the baby flavors. “I
grew up too fast” I tell myself, but I look around and see the same movie
rolling. As I lay in bed every night, I stressfully try to imagine my future. See
I have this plan in mind, a big one; I am starting to realize it’s bigger than
me. Is that dangerous? Or is it excellent ambition? Only time will tell I guess.
Whenever I am out and about dancing and enjoying “ohh yeuuuh” music I can’t
help but fall in love with everyone around me, it’s funny how impactful music
is!! Throw in the “Khomour” and call it Woodstock!!! I am trying to establish a
bond with my feelings at his moment trying to explain what I feel, but nothing
is coming out. That brick on the chest that requires that deep breaths with the
pfff in the end, has been the chorus this morning. Responding to that chorus is this chorus “Fear
don’t Fail me now”, I am starting to doubt my presence in Lebanon these days
and its killing me. I am trying to get all I can so in the end I am fine and
every door I knock on is taking a long time to open and I am exhausted. I am
aware that life is not honey and sugar and we need to lead the battle but at
certain point we need a voice louder than ours, a shoulder firm yet soft, a hug
warm and fulfilling. Yesterday I sat with someone I madly adore, a reflecting
mirror of my passion, and it’s not the lovely dovey admiration. It’s the deep one
that makes you listen, care, acknowledge and worry. Do you feel that way towards someone? Take a
deep moment and think of that one person that you seek to impress, to learn
from etc. I believe in life we all need that one person to keep us going. “In
life many people will try to put you down, you know not many are blessed with
our passion, I advise you to stick to it and never give up, “he said. And I listened!!!
So whenever the doubt strikes, I strike back with a double dosage of passion.
To whoever is reading if you find passion, invite it and don’t
fight it.
There's a war in my mind, a glamorous one!! care to join?
Thankful for YOU
MK
Thumbs up Micha! I want to add one more thing concerning passion. I used to think that no one can surpass my passion and devotion to the cause, to Lebanon; I always found something missing in what they are doing, until I met you! your devotion to the country, the cause and more importantly to what you are disregarding what other might or will think about you, such devotion is amazing.
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I Appreciate people like you Rafi2 :) you make me see hummanity in its true colors :)
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