How can a person base a feeling when it changes with every
split second? It seems these days you are happy/sad at the same time. I can be
laughing my heart out, dancing out loud, loving to the fullest and crying at
the same time. Being loyal to my feelings I rarely shed a tear in the dark. If I
have the urge to cry I will cry, if I have the urge to scream I will scream, if
I have the urge to cuss oh man I will cuss. I daily walk myself back home, it’s
a great way to ponder, but be aware of the dam Syrian workers who can get as
perverted as dogs and the psychotic drivers. When you find a way to shut all
that noise out and simply walk you will read yourself and learn a lot. For instance,
I lately found out how OCD I can get when it comes to cleaning!!! Some walks I spend
thinking what detergents I should mix to get the best results or where should I
start and nchalla ykoun fi water so I can eshtof . Mama you would be proud. Life
seems to surprise me daily, its screws me over and over but my love to it seems
to grow deeper and deeper. Some days I feel like a stranger in my own world,
are those the moments of growing up? Or just moments of despair, because my
family isn’t near me? But the last thing on my mind is giving up. I always sing
to myself “take it easy, for there is nothing I can’t do”. Lately my obsession with my beautiful Lebanon
has gotten out of control and I am loving it. But what I am not loving are the
ridiculous people who pause just to ask me, “why ktir 3ayeshtiya? “To be frank,
questions like thee deeply disappoint me. First my innocuous statements are
coming out of love, second Yes I am Kataeb and it’s deeply rooted in me SO?, third when
I see blocked roads ahead of me I don’t sit and honk I find ways to surpass,
and finally in what way have I added or subtracted from your life? Because of Lebanon,
I have grown to be a survival, to appreciate the small and aim for the big, to
love who deserve to be loved and of course to stand as proud as I can BE. So to
the tasteless people instead of asking ME how much my salary is? Or why I love Lebanon?
Ask ME, how are you today Michelle ? How's life, work? And end it with god bless you. I apologize if I am sounding negative this
morning, but the keys on my keyboard are as black as it can get, feeling
breathless but never out of breath. Today I would like to raise a glass to the
dreamers, who dream beyond the lines of reality. It is he who dreams that will reach
and he who judges will fade. We all are a tune in this world that will soon
stop playing, so make sure you are as loud and beautiful as you can be and
always remember to stay true to yourself because in the end its you and you and
you against you.
Don't cage yourself, Free yourself
Bold,
MKG
